


Contact Points

by silasfinch



Category: Wayfarers Series - Becky Chambers
Genre: F/F, Families of Choice, Family Feels, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Other, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-18
Updated: 2018-08-18
Packaged: 2019-06-29 02:14:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15719856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silasfinch/pseuds/silasfinch
Summary: Jenks is determined to preserve Lovey memory with the fight for AI rights. The Wayfarer crew isn't going to let him do this alone.





	Contact Points

**Author's Note:**

> Hard Reset is such a sad chapter I wanted to explore Jenks story arc more.  
> Started well before the third book so many not remain cannon.  
> Thanks my beta for another fantastic job. All mistakes are my own.

My belief is in the chaos of the world and that you have to find your peace within the chaos and that you still have to find some sort of mission

Ta-Nehisi Coates- American Author and Commentator.

 

 

 

The hardest thing is that there are no traces of Lovey left.

 

Jenks torments himself with many aspects of that day, but by far the worst pain is that there is nothing for him cherish except his memories. The Wayfarer does not even have a default Vox system, or stars forbid a standard Lovelace anymore. This is a small mercy on Ashby and Pepper's part, especially considering the crew needs such services with the new upgrades and increasing tunnelling demands.

 

Frankly, Kizzy needs a new partner in ship maintenance now that Pepper is departing, but she shrugs the suggestion off and continues picking up the slack, with a surprisingly talented Corbin assisting when shifts get exceedingly long.

 

Jenks retreats into his quarters, the air thick with all sorts of chemicals, a supply that Kizzy carefully regulates, knowing all his suppliers.

 

It's the silence that gets him.

 

He can't claim to experience a literal silence of course: the ship is noisier than ever before, humming with new rhythms and far better equipment but none of the sounds he longs for most, the soft hums or chirps that quickly became the soundtrack to his day.

 

There is no routine checking of Lovey's system lights in her core.

 

His voice becomes scratchy with disuse without their daily conversations on any topics no matter how trivial. Even Kizzy gave up meaningful discussions after the third or fourth time Jenks yelled at her. Rosemary is the one that keeps him tethered to the crew with status updates, no matter how reluctantly. He is incapable of letting this ship function inefficiently, so he reads the status reports and offers suggestions when they run into problems.

 

Lovey was a firm believer in people performing their duty.

 

 

His crewmates try, but they cannot understand

 

Jenks counts his blessings; they are respectful of his grief, many crews would scorn such feelings. AI-Human relationships are fringe even in the Tech Centre on Port Coriol, much less in broader society.

 

Ashby gives him as much time as he would any other crew mourning a loved one, his credits continue to pile up unused in his account.  The Captain affirms that The Wayfarer will find ways around not having an AI Interface, Lovey’s space will remain hers even if the dark chambers serve no practical purpose.

 

Sissix tactfully ignores the times he delays their jump testing schedules to go on a solo run. She obligingly lets the ship idle until he comes back, Rosemary having reworked the deadline for that day. They accommodate this expression of grief silently and pretend not to notice when his knuckles are bloody again and his eyes blown and red-rimmed.

 

In what must be a superhuman effort, Corbin even refrains from complaining about the waste of resources and the strain on his supplies. He merely sighs and goes to recalculate the intake formula. Ohan follows him, having taken an unexpected interest in the art form that fueled his navigation. An odd friendship but one that seems to thrive in their unique family.

 

 

 

Dr. Chef is immovable both literally and figuratively.

 

The Grum is one of the most even-tempered and jovial beings that Jenks has ever encountered, and he grew up in an environment that is all about preserving a loving peace and balancing with nature. It is easy to forget just how dark his past is until you give him a reason to behave otherwise.

 

Jenks supposes that giving every indicating of passively wanting to die offends the sensibilities of the provider - healer in him. Sometimes Jenks believes that he is a mother figure to their whole crew, regardless of what gender he currently inhabits.

 

Dr- Chef is at his door every day at the same time, brandishing food and hygiene products like they are weapons. Jenks feels flashes of guilt when his crewmates hand- feet shrivel uncomfortably in the toxic substances.

 

"You don't have to be here, you know, just let me wallow for a while" Jenk is not even ashamed that his drunk at this hour.

 

"You forget Jenks, that my people exterminated themselves using genetic warfare. Do you think you are the first being I have seen cowed by grief and the loss of a beloved? You are not even doing a creditable job of the process, only making everyone sick with worry," Dr. Chef warblesdarkly.

 

What does exactly does one say to that? To a being that lost all their daughters in a pointless war of self-annihilation?

 

"You should know I am perfectly willing to force feed and shower you. It would not be the first time I have done so; you should try caring for an orphaned Aandrisk who is grieving and molting at the same time, humans present a minimal challenge after that."

 

Jenks felt his pride reassert itself from the depths of his Smash-addled mind.

 

 

 

Pepper and Kizzy hold a funeral for Lovey, only the three of them

 

It is fitting that the three of them who were closest to her are involved. The other crew are occupied preparing for their first official job since the refit and swing by The Port for final details. Jenks does not even have time to ponder his direction before he is dragged along by his two of his best friends.

 

There isn't any custom they can follow given who they are commemorating, but Jenks is proud that he can speak and put into words his feelings, to a small degree. It is a relief to express his torment openly to the two people that will come to the closest to understanding.

 

Blue brings him to tears with a piece of art that represents Lovey's signal lights in a state of happiness. He must have done the work himself, nobody else would come close. the colouring is exact, and the message is clear to him. It is a private code, so it is likely they don't even know what she gave him, but it brings him tremendous joy nevertheless.

 

It is Pepper that runs the most significant risk of upsetting the balance, but she does so bravely as she does everything else.

 

She presents him and the Wayfarer with a viable alternative for installing a new Lovelace or similar model. Mindful of Ashby's firm beliefs, all the specifications are legal, but parts are uniquely modified to assist the many elements that are not off the shelf especially the new bore and Fishbowl. The technician in Jenks cannot help but be impressed by the thought and care that has gone into this construction. He could not have done a better job himself, and he practically build the ship from scratch.

 

The system is not sentient.

 

*****

 

Blue almost punches Jenks when he insults Pepper in a drunken rage when the two friends fly in to finish the system install.  He deserves it, Pepper just about dropped from exhaustion stabilising the ship and deserves far better than clumsy insults and cheap homebrew.

 

She defuses the situation with a tender smile and steely gaze before removing all traces of alcohol from his room, even finding his best hiding places and instructing Blue to dispose of them and any others he sees in the Tech Bay.

 

"You once said Lovey gave you the best version of yourself. Do you think that gentle being would be proud of you now? a drunken stupor, yelling at your friends and neglecting your ship to the care of one overworked tech and a struggling algae tech?"

 

"I can't bear to be on this ship; it is moving on without her! Sooner it will be better! If only I had used the Body, I would have her with me!" he cries in despair.

 

"Yes, it properly will unless you are in a fit state to preserve her memory!" Pepper yells back, surprisingly forceful for someone with such a ravished, skeleton-like frame.

 

Jenks knows she is right. He and Lovey had plans that went beyond their happiness. They wanted to promote a real discussion about AI rights, especially in the evolving forms that sentient life is taking nowadays. There is real positive chatter on the feeds about the direction things are heading with the new Council of Technological Ethics, all general right now but still tangible.

 

"Lovey would have been so excited," he laments softly to himself more than anyone.

 

"Yes and as you always have been, you can be her voice."

 

******

 

Jenks plays a game in the long nights when he is not sleeping

 

He likes to ponder the relationships of his crewmates since his own ended before it could begin in the most authentic sense of the word. He contemplates how the others categorise themselves and what the future holds for them.  He narrates a mental diary to Lovey in place of conversations.

 

Sissix and Rosemary are sweet on each other, he is confident their clerk fell for their pilot before the end of orientation.  For two different species they are well suited: Sissix craves understanding and Rosemary desires a sense of belong. They aren't overt around him, but it is plain to see how they feel, and it is not hard to guess what they are doing in downtime, especially with the scratches on Rosemary's skin and the odd angles of Sissix's feathers.

 

Jenks places good money on them lasting a long while, not forever, but enough to give each other high happiness.

 

Ashby, the puritan, blushes but does not comment.

 

Ashby and Pei make their unconventional relationship work. In some ways, they face stiffer odds. Pei does not bind herself by all the conversions of her species, but she is fiercely loyal to them. She will not flout tradition and 'set up house' with Ashby or integrate fully with the family. There are aspects of Aleuon culture that must remain private, but there is a balance between them.

 

Pepper and Blue found each other against all the odds, both areconsidered flawed by their peoples they mended each other and restore broken things for a living now. They will stay together forever, he is sure. Pepper achieves her dearest dream of finding her childhood ship and restoring her programming back to full health.

 

As close to 'happily ever after' as any of them is likely to get.

 

He will never know if his mother and her fellow believers had the wrong or right of philosophy.  He is both a product of nature and a lover of the artificial; he fits in a grey world that has no exact definitions.

 

If he was able to build the promise of a future with Lovey, he would find a way to develop one without her.

 

 

****

 

 

 

He won't let Lovey's sacrifice be pointless

 

Jenks cannot claim any blinding flash of insight that gave direction to his mourning and restless energy, but he does feel sick with guilt about insulting Pepper and angering gentle Blue so that correctly spurs things on. He cleans up the worst of the mess in his quarters, requests industrial cleaning products from Kizzy and reports for a full medical with Dr. Chef.  He sends a formal letter of apology to Ashby and returns his credits 'until he earns them back.'

 

Corbin is bemused but delighted when Jenks makes his minor list of repairs in record time and even offers several improvements to a finicky vat that gives precise tech trouble.

 

He needs to be healthy for this undertaking in body, mind and environment. His mother would be proud of his change in attitude.

 

The crew is shocked but delighted when he joins them in the Fishbowl, and Jenks realises that he has not done so in many TenDays.  He wonders around for several minutes examining the changes, from the adaptations for Ohan's comfort to the rows of new plants in assigned rows. He smiles when he sees Rosemary tending to her namesake herb in the far corner.

 

Dr. Chef rushes to prepare his favourite meal, having kept the supplies on hand for when he was feeling better and out of his isolation.  The others are similarly welcoming and quickly involve him in shop talk over Smoky Buns and bug meat.  The rhythm is so familiar that it gladdens his heart and he laughs when Kizzy recounts her latest misadventure.

 

They are enjoying dessert and 'boring tea' (he is not trusted with stimulants yet) when he feels comfortable enough to ask this question when there is a lull in the conversation.

 

"I need your help preserving Lovey's memory."

 

 


End file.
